I feel hurt here and do not know what to do.?
I was in a relationship for four years. The relationship has ended and it was mutual but we were very good friends. There was no big fall out. Along the way in the relationship I supported financially a course he wanted to pursue as a lifes ambition. I requested when the money was handed over that if he went on ahead to finish the project the money was a gift but if you gave up along the way the money was a loan. He agreed to this and called it a "debt of honour." He used to often joke about us still being friends when on zimmers and visit each other for a cuppa in the nursing homes. Also said he hoped we could remain friends no matter what.
Since the amicable conversation I have made no contact this last month with him and neither has he contacted me. However I have heard he is in a full on relationship with another woman and has officially declared he is not going to finish the project. He and she are to set up home together.
Would a decent honest person not have told me something of this? One on the relationship and what I believed the enduring friendship front.
I find myself living frugally at this time and feeling short of cash. I feel sad……strangely not about the other woman I am ok with that but sad about the lack of honesty about the money I helped with in good faith and a belief in the route he felt was right for him. I believed he was honorable.
His lack of communication…….is it guilt? Is he likely to come clean? Or is he simply thinking he got away with using a trusting friend.
Tagged with: ambition • being friends • belief • cuppa • debt of honour • friendship • good faith • good friends • guilt • honest person • honesty • lack of communication • money • nursing homes • Relationship • trusting friend • zimmers
Filed under: Nursing Home Guilt
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Write this guy a letter and just say that, as per your agreement, since he id not finish the course, you expect that he will pay the money back and that you ned it as soon as possible as you are short of cash. Don’t mention anything about his new relationship – let him draw his own conclusions about your motives if he wishes…what do you care what he thinks? Could it be tat he has just forgotten about your arrangement? either way, he owes you the money and he is morally obliged to pay up…it’s not nice when people let you down this way…tell him to pay up.